A couple of weeks ago, I had one of those days where I would have rather gone back home and pulled the covers over my head and start over. It seemed like everything that could go wrong, went wrong. My work day was not so productive, my son wasn’t feeling well, and things just seemed off. I found myself watching the clock waiting for the time to pass so that I could go home. I tried searching for a sermon online to listen to so that I could stay focused while working, but I couldn’t find one that really spoke to what I needed to hear. I just knew that I needed something.
My drive home was quiet. I didn’t want to listen to any music or hear any talk radio shows. I couldn’t shake this feeling that I had of not wanting to be bothered with anything. I prayed, but my mind wandered. I picked up my boys and things just snowballed by the time I got home. The rush of making dinner and meeting the needs of my family just felt overwhelming.
After putting my boys in bed, I sat quietly in their room with my iPad trying not to disturb them as I listened to them fall asleep. I opened my Bible app, and continued my reading in St. John. I read chapter 10 and read the scripture found in verse 14: “I am the good shepherd, and know my sheep and am known of mine.” I kept reading over and over again, “I am the good shepherd and I know my sheep.” While reading those words, I felt the peace of God come over me. God knows me and he knows how to bring comfort to me. He can pinpoint exactly what my issue is. He feels me when I am tugging on him. He can interpret my silence as well as my tears. He is indeed the good shepherd. He is my provider. He knows how to lead me to him so that I can find rest.
I knew that I couldn’t continue in the manner in which was feeling. I knew that my Lord was leading me to him. And as a great shepherd, he wasn’t going to let me go astray. I needed to be reminded and refreshed of his word and his promise. I needed to quiet myself and seek him so that his word could be revealed. I needed to get recharged and filled again. I needed to allow him to restore my soul.
God knows exactly what we are in need of when we surrender ourselves to him. When we go inward and surrender ourselves to him, He shows up. He has a way to bring about what we need so that we can find rest in Him. He is our good shepherd and he knows how to care for his sheep. When we feel lost and defenseless, remember he is right there to lead us to green pastures.
goinginward 